Monday late afternoon, July 18, 2016 I had to put my 19 year old girl to sleep. Her spirit wanted to stay and be with me, her body was just too weak. She could no longer get up on her own, I had to lift her and stand her up. Cancer inside was taking her life. She wasnít in any pain, so the vet let us have about 8 hours to do some "bucket list" things. I took off from work and had a fun day with her. Sammi was my last family member that tied in others that I have loss in the last 20 years. She was a rescue, from our neighbors. She saw 9/11 events and how the people around her reacted. She saw my father have a heart attack, about 3 years later she saw him die. She witnessed my parentís 50th anniversary. She saw my German Shepherd die. She witnessed my mother falling and breaking her hip, right in front of her. She latter saw her die. She went through the horrible transition of her and me moving. Loved the fact that then she started going with me to work and almost everywhere else I could take her. Shopping, church and other functions. Never though keeping her in a hot car with the A?C on for too long She became family, friend and a companion. She "mothered " me when I was sick. She comforted me in ways I can never explain. I believe she knew it and I have to say, she was closer to me and knew me better than I knew myself or others, including my parents. She was my child, but at times I was hers when I needed help
Grief is really not a bad element of life. It is real and it is something our hearts want. For me, my grief is of separation, and loneliness. I donít want to ever let go of that. It is bittersweet. Where my little girl is now, she is whole. No pain and no suffering. Heaven has no time, we on earth are the ones cursed by it. When I am reunited with my family, friends and my little girl, Sammi, it will be like we just spoke and saw one another. She was a blessing and still is, to me, a gift from our Creator Almighty God. And I thank him for having her in my earthly life. She will always stay with me in my heart. And yes I believe I know and can sense her spirit with me. It is real. My little girl is no longer here on earth, but in heaven. And I rejoice in knowing I will get to hold her paw, rub her chest and the side of her face, again, for eternity. As we together with the rest of our family love, worship and praise our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. We serve and are blessed by a loving God, Jehovah. Thank you God, for my Sammi. And thank you for the love and gift of eternity.
Sammi was so much to me. I am and chose to be lonesome because of our seperation. The comfort I have is in knowing she is healed and I will be seeing her one day. That doesnt mean I stop focusing on what is to be done in this life. I just look forward to being reunited with family, friends, animals and my very special Sammi girl.