In loving memory of my Toby who I miss so much. Toby was the light of my life and his passing has left a hole in my heart that I fear will never heal.
Toby came into my life at a time when I needed his love and gentleness the most. He was a 6 month old bundle of energy and mischief. Every day was a special adventure for my happy and quirky baby boy. He made me laugh and smile every single day of the 5 1/2 years we had together.
He loved everyone and everyone loved him back.
Toby, I still listen for you to "yell" from the top of the stairs, waiting for me to call - "Tobalicious, where ARE you?" so you could bounce down the stairs and jump into my arms. I still watch for you to stand on your hind legs next to the recliner so that you could pat me on my arm and ask if you could come on my lap. Even though I don't have to, I still put every item with a lace (shoes, hoodies, sweat pants, etc.) away so that you won't eat the laces and hurt yourself. I do the same with towels, socks, t-shirts so that you won't eat those, too. I still wait for you to jump on the bathroom counter so that you can put those big white paws around my neck in a hug and give me a lovebite on my bottom lip. I still wait for you to come running when I turn on the faucet so that you can grab a drink of water before I make my coffee. I still wait for you to try to swat your food dish out of my hand like you did every morning because you wanted your breakfast NOW!
Bella is so lost without you. This morning, she brought me your chewy worm and dropped it in my hand. She looks for you all over the house and doesn't understand that you won't be back to play with her. You were sooo tolerant of that little puppy and never flinched when she'd bark at you.
I have so many wonderful memories of you that I can't begin to list them all. You were my special little man, so different from every other cat I've ever known. I know just how much you loved me, Tobalicious, because you came looking for me when you were dying so that I could get you help. Most kitties would have hidden someplace and died alone but not you. When Dr. Ed told me that he couldn't help you, you waited for me to come back to your side and tell you it was ok to cross the Rainbow Bridge. Saying good-bye to you was the hardest thing I've ever done but it would have been so much harder if I hadn't been able to. You knew that, didn't you?
You left me so unexpectedly - I didn't even know that you were sick until it was too late. I hope that you know that if I had known, I'd have done literally anything to make you well and keep you with me. Thank you so much, Toby, for all the days, months, and years of love, laughter, and downright silliness. It's far too quiet and lonely without you. You were my rock when I needed you and my soft place to fall when I needed that, too. I've always joked that you are the only male in my life that has never let me down but it's the absolute truth.
Rest well, Tobalicious, and say hi to Max and Tigger for me. I know that someday we'll be together again and meet at the Rainbow Bridge. Until then, know that I love you and miss you more than words can say.